OYSTERHOOD is reclusiveness or solitude, or an overwhelming desire to stay at home.

— @HaggardHawks

Spoilt rotten. That’s how I felt at the end of the day when my love invited me to dinner at one of our favourite restaurants, FYN. They were closed for a while (you know why) and have now reopened with a bang and a winter menu to live for.

This feast tasted even better and the evening was more relaxed than it would have been only a few days ago, because I knew that my feline patient at home was also enjoying her food. The first time we tried the thyroid diet, it was very difficult to get her to eat, but now she is gobbling it all up, and I still have tears in my eyes seeing her enjoy her food. I am frightened of what still lies ahead of us, but every day I have more and more hope that it will all be soon behind us and Salieri will enjoy many more years of her beautiful life.

The day itself was exhausting, but in a good way. Meetings, deliveries, admin, visits to two bookshops and PostNet and the post office. I feel like I should have a frequent visitor card for both. They know me by name at all the local branches.

I also saw my counsellor and we spoke about my timeline and dreams and crocheting and meditation and enabling, and most of it is not easy, but it helps to make me feel less afraid. I had a few nights of real sleep in the past week. Miracles in progress.

Be kind. Wear a mask. Support local.

“Physical distancing remains one of the key strategies to curb this pandemic.”

— NICD

OYSTERHOOD is reclusiveness or solitude, or an overwhelming desire to stay at home.

— @HaggardHawks

Karina Day, or 2 August, my name day. My best friend from Austria was the first one to send wishes just after midnight. I slept! I am managing to sleep again; it feels like a miracle. A day of drinking bubbly followed, but mainly because of other celebrations. My dear friend Debbie cooked a delicious lunch for us and we opened a bottle of bubbly to celebrate Karen’s Booker longlisting. Debbie was one of the novel’s first SA readers and she is the artist behind the beautiful cover illustrations.

I returned home just in time for another botte of bubbly and another lovely celebration: Nancy, Monique and I toasted The Skipper’s Daughter on my stoep. The book is making its way into the world and I cannot thank Nancy and Monique enough for the amazing time we spent working on it together.

In the evening, my love and I had a simple but delicious takeaway dinner from a new Greek place in my neighbourhood: Yiayia’s Table. I spoke to Mom and Krystian on Skype afterwards.

I spent the rest of the evening at my computer, trying to catch up with work. I dropped into bed at midnight.

And today was one of those days when I found myself running around from one place to another, doing a million things and feeling as if I had achieved nothing. I need a PA.

Two beautiful bunches of roses arrived at my gate today: name day flowers from my family and a sunny bouquet from one of Karavan Press’s authors to congratulate us on the longlisting. I am still smiling – what a privilege it is to know such lovely people and to work with them and to call them friends.

Salieri and I are working on her diet transition. She needs to go on the thyroid diet before her operation. I think we are doing well. The most important thing right now is that she is eating and not losing weight. And her beautiful fur is gradually re-growing in all the shaved spots.

An ADT technician came to replace another faulty beam in my alarm. He had been here a few times before and has always been kind and efficient in solving my alarm issues. He and his immediate family have managed to avoid getting Covid-19, and he has had both vaccines, but he was asking me whether I have had mine, whether I was okay and keeping safe, not only from theft. A stranger who cares about others.

On a day when another five hundred plus people have been reported dead from Covid-19.

Be kind. Wear a mask. Support local.

“Physical distancing remains one of the key strategies to curb this pandemic.”

— NICD

OYSTERHOOD is reclusiveness or solitude, or an overwhelming desire to stay at home.

— @HaggardHawks

Weekend, a real one. There was a little bit of work, but mostly because I felt like it. For the rest of the time, I indulged in creative activities: compiled my timeline, continued crocheting, listened to Meditative Stories, read a few snippets here and there (the hunger and concentration for books are gradually returning) and gardened. It was good to watch the rugby with my love and to go for a walk around the Rondebosch Common together. But the highlight of the weekend was the live Derek Gripper concert at the Alma Café.

I listed to one of Derek’s live online concerts during hard lockdown last year while cooking dinner one evening, and the joyous memory stuck with me. Last time my brother was in Cape Town just before the lockdown, we went to see Derek live at Maynardville. Today, after weeks of not being able to operate, the Alma Café reopened with a live concert and, together with twenty-odd socially distanced patrons (nowadays that’s a packed venue), my love and I basked in Derek’s guitar storytelling. His music and the tales he told brought the world into the small space of the café and transported us into a time beyond the relentless present. I am listening to “One Night on Earth: Live in 2021” available on Derek’s website as I type. It is sublime. Pure magic.

To be under the same sky or roof with a performer of such talent and skill has always been a privilege. Now, it is what keeps hope for a better tomorrow alive. Thank you, Derek and the Alma Folks, for nourishing our souls – with beauty and deliciousness (the world’s greatest lemon meringue pie was on the menu tonight!).

Good night.

Be kind. Wear a mask. Support local.

“Physical distancing remains one of the key strategies to curb this pandemic.”

— NICD

OYSTERHOOD is reclusiveness or solitude, or an overwhelming desire to stay at home.

— @HaggardHawks

Another day of Salieri eating all on her own. I got a scale for her, so that we can monitor her weight until her operation. It pleases me no end that she has gained a little bit of weight since her return from the clinic. We must just watch out that she doesn’t get too much exercise while crocheting … ;)

A lovely visit from a friend in the afternoon. We had tea on the stoep.

I picked up the author’s copies of the latest Karavan Press book today and will be handing them over to the author tomorrow. This is always such a joyous moment. The book turned out so well. Even though I have read it several times during the production process, I find it highly inviting in its published form again.

At the end of the day, I received an incredibly kind and generous email. There are some really decent people out there, and it is a huge privilege to be working with them.

Be kind. Wear a mask. Support local.

“Physical distancing remains one of the key strategies to curb this pandemic.”

— NICD

OYSTERHOOD is reclusiveness or solitude, or an overwhelming desire to stay at home.

— @HaggardHawks

I slept through the night, for seven straight hours. I don’t remember when was the last time this happened. And I fell asleep in all my day clothes, just after flossing my teeth in bed. I meant to brush them and to get into PJs, but … I know I was too tired and too frustrated with my laptop (suddenly very slow, but all back to normal today after some TLC) to write Oysterhood last night, but I did not know that I was this tired. In general, yes (exhausted for months now), but not in particular. Yesterday seemed like a rather calm day. I listened to another Meditative Story, read (yes!), met with a lovely author on Skype, did some work and ran some errands (I am still on leave, but a certain longlist cannot be ignored and it is the loveliest of things to have to think about and do things around), and in the evening had another delicious Kitchen Republik dinner with my love, while we finished watching Mare of Easttown (an excellent series).

I slept, and it felt like a miracle.

My brother reported that he did have a reaction to his second jab: fever, tiredness, chills in the night, etc. Nothing that he wasn’t expecting. My Mom also suffered a little after her second dose, so I guess, if it runs in the family, I will have to take a day or two off after my second jab at the end of August. I can’t wait anyway!

Over five hundred people reported dead in the last twenty-four hours, and the same the day before. Official warnings about local hospitals at full capacity this weekend. This is not the time to do stupid things that might lead you to the trauma unit.

Joburg experienced an earth tremor this morning.

I keep thinking: Are there volcanoes in South Africa?

Good news is the GOLD and world record at the Olympics for Tatiana Schoenmaker. Congratulations! And I still haven’t watched a single Olympics event … Hopefully, this weekend!

Friday. I am starting a new crocheting project. And I have to do therapy homework – something I am really looking forward to: my life’s timeline.

Be kind. Wear a mask. Support local.

“Physical distancing remains one of the key strategies to curb this pandemic.”

— NICD

OYSTERHOOD is reclusiveness or solitude, or an overwhelming desire to stay at home.

— @HaggardHawks

What a story! Yes, I am still pinching myself. Even though I had felt how special this book is from the very first page of the manuscript, and the longlist is not a surprise in this respect. But when I think back under what kind of circumstances Robert from Holland House Books and I made the book happen in the UK and here respectively, it all feels like a miracle.

I will continue believing in these stories, the ones that need a home where kindness lives. Holland House Books is such a home. And I hope that Karavan Press is, too.

I have loved Karen’s writing for so many years now. To see it shining in the world like this is pure joy.

The other reason for celebration is that my brother had his second jab today. All three of the people who are closest to me are now fully vaccinated and so much safer than they had been for much too long. My heart is beating with a calmer rhythm.

I saw my counsellor today again. It was only our third meeting, but she also makes my heart and mind calm down. I feel safe with her. And at a time when I am battling fear and anxiety on many levels, this is a huge gift.

Another gift was the arrival of Penny Haw’s latest novel, The Wilderness Between Us, just released in the US. I am still struggling to read – I am struggling with everything, really – but I have a sense that I might be able to lose myself in this story. Can’t wait!

I cooked a version of lecsó tonight for the first time in years. It was delicious, even if I say so myself. Cooking also relaxes me. And sharing food with my love is always a highlight of the day.

Sharing food with Salieri is not as easy, but we have managed another day without syringes. It wasn’t entirely easy to find things she wanted to eat, but we are getting there. Yesterday morning, she vomited again, but luckily it only happened once. Her fur is growing back everywhere. And she loves meditating with me. I think she is soothed by the music and the voices. I definitely am. Small steps.

Be kind. Wear a mask. Support local.

“Physical distancing remains one of the key strategies to curb this pandemic.”

— NICD

OYSTERHOOD is reclusiveness or solitude, or an overwhelming desire to stay at home.

— @HaggardHawks

My dear friend Helen gave me a jar of her pickled lemons when I saw her last time. They are beyond delicious. These are the kind of lemons that I want from life.

I put in a full day’s work today, and I feel like I have let myself down. I did what I’d promised a while ago that I would, so I did not let somebody else down, but this being on leave is not exactly working out for me how I’d imagined it would … The one thing I did do for myself today was to listen to another Meditative Story in the early morning. And, in the evening, I cooked a really nice dinner for my love and for myself.

But my cheeks are sore again, my OCD and anxiety are through the roof, and I am edgy, distracted in ways where I feel simply lost. Who is this person, tying up her hair in a braid, then in in a bun, all tightly out of the way, so that she feels at least a little bit in control?

The worst about all of this is that, even in good moments, the lack of emotional resources to deal with most things is constantly under the surface of the everyday, ready to erupt. And this at a time when one of the most incredible dreams of my professional life is about to come true. I am bursting with excitement to announce it, but it has to wait a while yet. All I should be doing, though, is wallowing in happiness and pink bubbly (especially now that it can actually be bought for the first time in a month!). But that’s not how depression works …

And my lovely Salieri is getting stronger and more independent again every day. In the last twenty-four hours, she has had the first night and day that she did not require any assistance with eating. And she did not even spend the night on the bed with me. She has been quite clingy since she became ill, but now she is doing more and more of her own thing. It is such a huge relief.

Sadly, the horrible news reached us today that a little dog whom we really liked was brutally killed by another one. The dog’s human family is devastated, and so am I. I did not know her well, but whenever I visited her home, I was always welcomed with the friendliest of smiling tails. I am going to miss her, and I can only imagine how her family feels about her tragic death.

The relentlessness of it all.

Here is a song we played this weekend that I love, especially the bits where Roy Orbison signs (the voice!): “The Traveling Wilburys – Handle With Care”.

Last Week Tonight is back …! Off I go to watch in bed. Good night.

Be kind. Wear a mask. Support local.

“Physical distancing remains one of the key strategies to curb this pandemic.”

— NICD

OYSTERHOOD is reclusiveness or solitude, or an overwhelming desire to stay at home.

— @HaggardHawks

My counsellor recommended that I try meditation. I have been curious about it for years, but never had an opportunity to explore. Because I am a writer, she thought that Meditative Story might be a good place to start for me. This morning, I finally gave it a go and at random chose the perfect episode: “Learning resilience from earth’s edge, by Tony Tjan“. It resonated on many levels and I and The Cats really enjoyed the half hour we listened to Tony Tjan’s story.

I have done some reading this weekend, and spent time with my love. Together, we had a socially distanced lunch with dear friends who have been through much pain lately and are somehow surviving despite impossible challenges. We had a wonderful meal with them and listened to some great music and just basked in one another’s company. It was our first meal with friends in a month.

I watched the first episode of “Reyka”. I am not so sure about all the ‘artistic’ camera work, sound and lighting – it feels overdone, artificial – but the characters and the plot are intriguing, so I will continue watching. Local is lekker, after all.

And it’s Level Three again. I wouldn’t mind getting myself a bottle of pink Miss Molly sometime this week and I will see a few friends socially again, but preferably in their gardens or on their stoeps, or mine. I can’t wait to be fully vaccinated and to be able to meet with people without fearing for their and my own life.

I haven’t gotten into the Olympic spirit yet, but I will work on it soon. I did enjoy this from Dulcé Sloan: “Dulcé roasts the Olympics opening ceremony”.

Be kind. Wear a mask. Support local.

“Physical distancing remains one of the key strategies to curb this pandemic.”

— NICD

OYSTERHOOD is reclusiveness or solitude, or an overwhelming desire to stay at home.

— @HaggardHawks

My love got his second jab today, and the relief is gigantic. We went out to breakfast to celebrate. Our first restaurant visit in nearly a month. We have been supporting local restaurants with takeaways as much as possible during level four, but it was so good to just order the food, sit down and have it.

We also had good literary news on two different fronts. And my love had a bottle of bubbly to celebrate the whole day of positive vibes at dinner. After all the challenges, sadness, loss, relentlessness of the past few weeks, today was simply a good day. Salieri needed help with food only once. And the sun came out to say hello, too.

I did wake up in the night, freezing, and had to put on the electric blanket to fall asleep again, but seeing snow on the mountains while running errands all around the Cape today made up for the cold (Topolino’s heater kept me warm). I did not feel on leave at all today, but the work did not bother me – and that in itself is a sign of healing.

Thank you.

Be kind. Wear a mask. Support local.

“Physical distancing remains one of the key strategies to curb this pandemic.”

— NICD